Never in all the years of being attuned to the travel community have I heard a harsh word spoken about Vienna. In fact, quite the opposite, generally people just can’t seem to shut up about this glorious world city, nestled in the ALPs, just bustling with culture and goodness etc. I had a little hatred for all those boastful travellers as I glared out the window of the “circle tram” in downtown Vienna. I hated them for luring me to this bleak location. I hated them for housing some sort of Vienna secret that clearly I was not privy to.
I should like this city, actually no, I should LOVE this city. Regal buildings, friendly people – it has a small town charm despite its size. We watched families skating on a downtown rink, couples nestling in horse drawn carriages and men, in that apparently common European way, out for a stroll and a chat. Everything was named “Volks” something…there was the “Volksgarten” and the “Volksbanken”…very inclusive. Yet...I disliked it all. 
We toured one of the museums that had been open since the 1890’s, it housed some very nice jewels as I recall – but still I was not enchanted. In an attempt to salvage the day, we decided to partake in the popular Vienna backpacker activity of standing room Opera tickets. Tickets to the actual seats in the Opera are extremely sought after and pricey, but for just a few Euros, there is a section, center mezzanine level, where you are permitted to stand for the duration of the show and still get to be a part of it all.
We patiently waited over an hour in line for our tickets, and then followed the crowd of the underdressed to the standing room section. It is essential that if you ever choose to visit the Wiener Staatsoper in this fashion, you wear a scarf. Similar to the leaving on jacket on the back of a chair as a place holder, a scarf tied loosely over the railing will secure your spot.
Perhaps Vienna was turning around for me. Watching the light dance across the intricately painted vaulted ceilings, a result of the crystal chandeliers and barrage of gold leaf captivated me for a little while. I enjoyed studying the faces of the Opera regulars as the settled into their regular box seats and glance with expected disdain to the standing section. Feeling a bit peckish, and with an hour until Mozart’s Cosi Fan Tutte was set to start, we decided to leave the Opernhaus and grab a snack from a nearby vendor. Leaving the building was our mistake.
As much as I am whining about my day and my general dislike for the city, it is important to note that both of my travel partners, Caitlin and Kathy seem to be having an equally dreadful time. Perhaps it is the cold, or the fact that we are on the 15th hour of our day that actually started in Munich, or that we are just a little on each other’s nerves after 8 days of being together. Or maybe it’s the fact that it is Valentine’s day, and although no one is acknowledging it out loud, it was very annoying to be single and touring a romantic city on the most romantic day of the year. Our civility was wearing thin and we were all just looking for an opportunity to pounce. Kathy was lucky one that was given a justified reason to snap, Caitlin and I just merely watched on, in envy really.
We were reentering the opera house, prepared to stand, relax and enjoy one of the world’s best composers pieces performed in one of the most magnificent Opera houses in the world. We were quietly making our way back to the standing area when were accosted by a young usherette. In what I am sure was her best English, she explained that Kathy was not dressed appropriately for the Vienna Opera house. It seems as though her rather expensive travel pants did not meet the unwritten dress code of the Wiener Staatsoper. “Trackers are not permitted” I believe was the exact phrase. If the wide-eyes were any indication, I don’t think that poor usherette was prepared for the rapid fire retort that came out of Kathy. At least a day of exhaustion and frustration was released on this girl; “Trackers what in the hell are trackers. I’ll have you know these pants cost $99 US dollars. They are certainly good enough to stand at some Opera”. Caitlin, clothed in yoga pants, is never one to miss a good scrap and jumped into support Kathy explaining to the usherette that had already been permitted to the seating area, we were merely returning to our scarves. This girl must have been the best hall monitor in her school, she was not budging on allowing Kathy and her offensive trousers into the Opera – she behaved as though Mozart would roll over in his grave if such an abomination were to occur.
In the end we were able to see the performance by merely entering through a different door but our moods were still soured and after 30 min of Cosi Fan Tutte we choose to depart. We paid our own reverence to Mozart that night, by dining at a restaurant adorned with his name.
I am not sure if it was the bleariness of the weather, the undertone of that particular day or the fact that I was almost tossed out of the Vienna Opera House but to this day I still remain one of the only people in existence not to be enchanted by Vienna. (They do have good wiener schnitzel however…)
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