I used to think I was like a hippo...generally lazy in appearance...out of shape and unassuming but secretly lethal. Appearing all sweet floating under the water but with the capability to bite a person in half should I so desire. Now I think maybe I am more like a polar bear.
Aside from the obvious...Canadian and adorably cuddly... Polar bears are quite misunderstood. Depicted as vicious human hunting predators by various YouTube videos and the Discovery channel but then as adorable, lovable bears that just need a relaxing carbonated beverage by Coca Cola. So...who to believe? How can the same bear that says "ahhh" and holds up that iconic red can then crave human blood so much?
Today I climbed into a giant Tundra Buggy to try and find out. A tundra buggy is a gigantic custom made truck - the wheels that sits 5.5 feet off the ground and the passengers are another 7 feet above that. It's probably 14 feet wide and has rows of school bus seats that seat 40 people. There is also a small viewing platform out back that I can tell you does not hold 40 people. But it can drive where no other vehicle can - across the tundra to polar bear point.
We saw a few bears enroute to the "hot" zone - at least per guide JP said they were bears...they looked a lot like rocks to me. But once we entered the promise land were encountered a few very curious bears. They were little (for polar bears) but appeared huge when trying to climb on to the buggy for a little exploring. I almost dropped my camera when one small female I was photographing stood up right under me - looking through the view finder makes objects appear closer than they are too. The bears spent a lot of time just sitting their heads cocked, smelling whatever was wafting out of our buggy, and wishing for a little bite - same way most of us look when the scent of chocolate is in the air.
Located in the hot zone is a tundra buggy hotel - essentially just a bunch of tundra buggies strung together and retrofitted to have bunks, showers and an eating area. Given the remote access to this hotel and the astronomical prices I am sure the people pay, there is a whole slew of daily maintenance that has to occur. The curious bears in the area have now been labeled as nuisance bears as they have limited the staffs ability to maintain the hotel. Today we watched as two maintenance men were cornered on top of a truck and later on the hotel by a bear that appeared nothing but cuddly the whole time.
The biggest laugh of the day came when the Austrian born cook and one of the bears had an unlikely encounter. Normally the bears are opportunistic - much like me. They aren't actively seeking food but if something were to fall in front of them, they would eat it. One of today's s bears was either very curious or on decided to make a teeny attempt at rattling a human free from the buggy.
The young female bear hoisted herself up onto a narrow diagonal pole that hangs under the buggy...balance on this narrow pole...and explore the floor above her - which happens to be the grate floor that separates two of the buggies.
We watched this from the safety our buggy while the poor maintenance guys were trapped on the roof. Then someone spotted movement through the windows of the dining buggy - the cook was on the move. She proceeded thought the buggy, oblivious to the fact that that she was about to be essentially standing on a bear.
She stepped onto the platform and a cacophony of yells from us and the maintenance men appears to overwhelm her senses. After what felt like an eternity she glanced down and saw the bear gazing up at her through the grate. I wished someone had measured the height of her jump...record setting.
Of courses she was fine...like I said the bear is opportunistic - waiting for the food to be delivered - conserving energy - much like me…(it’s one thing to cook dinner but another to have it delivered to your door...)
My conclusion...polar bears are kind of like us. Some days you just want to lie around and avoid people. Sometimes we can be curious and want to explore the world around us. But no one will say no to Thai takeout.
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